A Brand New Feeling

Something new is happening, something new is brewing, changing starting to come to the surface. It's a new dawn, a new day, a new beginning. You can see the seed just beginning to grow, if you look very carefully, in me you will see it. And when it sprouts my god how magnificent it will be, because no longer will I want things I can have, no longer will I try to be something I am not, I will be me. I will not care what people think of it, few care nowadays why not continue the trend only being happy about it, even if that is a little selfish, shit happens, deal with it. With my friends at my side life will change for the better, to the point where they can be glad and proud to tell people that I am their friend. Because it is with their help alone that I have seen the error of my ways, that life will change. Today I saw the change begin, I felt the peace of letting go and living for once, I found out that life is more than who we are. But there was one change that I found the most significant, the most definite. I think about her all the time, but I have let go and now am just tryin to live and be her friend, maybe someday things will change and I will make god regret he ever left one of his angels behind, but for now i will just try to be with her, make her see how truly beautiful she really is, and maybe then i will be destined for heaven, maybe that will get my ticket home, my ticket to peace. A better peace than i am feeling now cuz make no mistake about it, i am at peace, but this will be the peace i have always wanted. And even if i am just left to sit outside heaven's door and listen to you breathing, that will be the peace that i would give everything for, that is my peace. But this new feeling will have to do, don't get me wrong it truely is amazing to be more at peace than i have been in ages, but hopefully this life of mine will have a happy ending, thats where i want to be...

Evolution-part duce

What a rollercoaster life has been lately, i must admit i was expecting it. Now if you were not in my head you wouldn't know about this little rollercoaster ride i have been takin lately, and i don't expect you to know about it or pity me or anything. I havn't had pity in ages i don't want anything to do with it now. No need to tell ya that life changes, continually. You may never see that change but it does. My mindset is no different. The light at the end of the tunnel turned out to be a candle leading to another crossroad of pitch black swollowing darkness. Praying didn't help end it, god got the hell outta this tunnel ages ago. But what do i do now? Lay down and die? I don't think so. The game may be over but i never said i was going to keep playing. The game changed and i couldn't keep up with it. Aw well, time for me to play a new game, one that doesn't change so much. So i will take the right path, and hope that it leads out or at least to somewhere alittle nicer. But if it doesn't and the tunnel just keeps going then thats the way it's going to have to be. See if there is one constant on this planet it is the fact that life will always change, so i make this pact now. By the end of the year, the game will have changed, big time, you will see it in ME for once, not the people around me. Although they have contributed to this change and i thank them all for it. But it won't be about how they have gotten smarter or more poplular, or richer or whatever, it will be about ME and how people WILL notice me for what i will be, not for who i know and who they are. By the end of the year you won't know me, and you will probably want to, so i am thrilled to death over it. Because change is what people wanted...change is what they will get...